SD??? why you ask????

wondering why his codename is sd???( if you dont know who the f*** sd is, see post below ) well here’s why:

so in 4th grade, i had just started liking bob at the end of the year.  at the end of the year, we do square dancing. 1rst for gold rush day. my partner for this time was my friend, tiffany. however, we could dance again on the cultural festival held at my old school.  i said i could dance that day. tiffany couldnt. so i needed to be assigned a new partner.

mrs. 4th grade: you’ll dance with

me thinking: dont be bob, dont be bob, dont be-

mrs. 4th grade: bob

me thinking: oh wow… -_-

but that day was fun. me and bob were talking and laughing while dancing. we were talking about how the 3rd graders should laugh while they can, because next year they’ll be on stage and we’ll be laughing at them. so thats why bob’s name is S.D. for squaredancing. me, alina, and erica were working on a project one day when somehow we got onto the topic of who we liked and went from there. alina automatically guessed bob. i was like ” uh.. is it that obvious?” so now everyday after 5th, erica always tries to say hi to bob. i walk either way ahead of her or way behind her because if i walk next to her he might suspect something…. so anyway, thats why bob is known as S.D.

Just a phase?? I think not….

so it seems like everyone of my friends has had a crush on the guy i like at some point on the other…..

examples:

last year, katrina and me: katrina” im so mad at lana!! i know who she likes. she likes ( lets call him bob) bob.

me thinking: ……. wow

katrina ” i think i like him too…”

me thinking: oh wow…….

katrina ” so who do you like??”

me “………………..( long silence or in other words, AWKWARD TURTLE! ) um he doesnt go to school here…..

katrina ” oh ok”

it was a very awkward conversation for me… even jx liked him at one point…

j.x.: ” you know in 3rd grade i liked bob??

me: ” really??”

j.x.: ” ya but i dont like him anymore… i dont even know why i liked him

me: (fake humor) ” haha came to your senses??”

j.x.: ” ya”

so ya,  a lot of my friends( and j.x.)  have gone through a ” liking bob phase” except i dont think mine is a phase…. and its freaking the hell out of me cause i doubt he likes me back and im just wasting my time, but i’ve liked bob since 4th grade!!! phases dont last 3 years!!!! so ya i clearly need help…. my friends alina, erica, and penelope are gonna help me get over him and i’m going to help them with their crushes.

we even came up with code names for them so we can talk about them in public. alina’s is h.r. for homeroom because the guy she likes is in my homeroom. erica’s is h.a. because those are the last letters of his first and last name. mine is s.d. for square dancing( which remind me to explain in another post cause mine is kind of long and im too lazy right now…) penelope wont tell us who she likes. but alina and erica keep pestering her to tell us. she calls me the nice one because i dont really ask her about it. so ya that was this weeks post

Random updates and such…

obviously im lazy right now considering the fact that i couldn’t even think of a proper title….

so, remember the last post?( dont look at me like that) well this wednesday it happened again. it was in the bandroom. i thought my friend was having a challenge today so i stayed after class to watch. but it just so happened that they changed the day to thursday. i was standing there talking to my friend, jennifer,  when i caught him again. noticing this and feeling quite awkward, i moved behind the cabinet door and continued talking. it most likely happened like so: ” hey so is your challenge today?” ” no we changed it to tomorrow” *notices* *moves* ” i see. thats interesting.” my friend alina who likes this other guy and me have decided to talk to the other person’s crush. though we haven’t started yet…

anyways, this post also has to do with the previous posts about my friend that went to a different school( anastatia) and how everyone is being mean to her. according to my friends, at her birthday party last year, they ignored her and were just doing whatever they wanted. well i dont know where that’s coming from. i myself payed attention to her. i feel really bad for anastatia. but apparently im the only one. even the friends i thought were nice wont do anything to stop it. it really bothers me…

these days i’ve been really confused about the above. i’ve been wondering whether or not to get over this guy and if my friends really are my friends. im just waiting for the moment i become the next anastatia…

Don’t look at me like that…

lol ok so i know this post is a week late but i’ve been procrastinating

ok so last week at my school there was the talent show. but this post wont make any sense if i dont tell u the story behind it. soo….

backstory time!:  ok so for the longest time( seriously, like since the end of 4th grade i think) i’ve liked this guy who i swear i have no chance with. however i have never been able to get over. until this one day when he really ticked me off and ever since then i’ve been trying to get over him. ok back to the…

main story!: but my plans have been thwarted due to the fact that at the talent show, the guy i’ve been trying to get over, lets call him “bob”( snce thats shorter and easier for me to remember) was caught staring at me before the show. when i noticed this, to keep myself from staring back at him with a weird face( such as :\ or :/) i quickly looked down at the schedule for the show. then while looking down, i started to wonder, ” what if he’s looking at me like that because he found out i like him and he’s like O.o. or what if, maybe, he likes me back? oh man! that is so gonna mess up my ‘ get over him’ plan!”

anyways, in other news, my favorite person showed up right in the middle of an act( lol fail) and sat right inbetween me and katrina! -_- well thats all the (late) news for now

:3

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high off halls???

first off i would like to wish u all a happy valentines day

anyway, back on topic… yesterday i went off to the hell hole of la, the valley!!! :O  i got to hang out with these losers i call my friends: sarah, anna, abbie, and alicia.  hooray!

but i’ve been kind of sick lately and at the party i kept coughing so abbie said ” here geez i have a cough drop just eat it!!!” and when im with them i can be crazy and say weird stuff so they were saying i got high off the halls.

on another topic, remember that kid, andrew??? if not see nice friends go mean and chuckie the doll becomes little boy.  well, let me just say: he’s baaaaaaackkkk!! he was doing his famous slamming into the door move -_- then he would come into the room in the middle of dark room when the door is supposed to stay closed  and he would just burst in. if someone was leaning against the door they would go splat!   then sometime during the party, he was trying to open the door so hard and far that the mirror on the wall would have broken if it werent for alicia standing there trying to stop him.  then parents came up thinking that we were locked in the room and were pounding on the door trying to get help. well let me tell u, not again! and then when andrew’s mom came up and we told her what happened, he just said that we did it…. O.O  then he had this rug burn on his hand and he said we did it >:O then his mom asked us if we did it and we said no but she clearly didnt believe us… and sarah said she had come to the conclusion that andrew was a perv because he was poking this girl, lets call her tiffany, in the butt. then he hit alicia in the butt and when he did that i said out loud to sarah ” omigod he is!!!” and then the whole rest of the night andrew’s mom was just staring at us like this >:( and we were like O.O

on a lighter note, while we were trying to find something to do i said how about truth or dare because thats always entertaining. but anna, sarah, and alicia said no because our dares get kind of  crazy. but abbie responded with a ” when did that happen??” and we told her about that time when we went to her house and were playing truth or dare and we did some pretty crazy stuff. she was like how come i dont remember any of this??? so that was funny( if u dont know what happened then go to the post: pretty crazy… i cant even tell you guys =)

anyway, that was the highlight of my weekend. how was your valentines day weekend??

exacty 1 year ago…

so 1 year ago was the day j.x. stopped talking to me. i look back on the posts from last february and think about how immature i acted… i continued to want her to talk to me, hoping it was just a phase. i kept hoping that someday she would get over it. now i realize i couldn’t care less.

i think my thoughts on this whole situation have improved. anyway, thats pretty much it for today. happy valentines day!

” maybe shes not the performing type…”

so today in band i had a challenge with a good friend of mine, lets call her danielle, who is( or should i said ” was”) a chair below me. a challenge is when someone 1 chair below u can pick a piece of music. they’ll give u a few days to practice it and then ur chair will be on the line. if u win, everything stays the same( sort of a bitter victory if u ask me) but if the other person wins then they take ur chair and u take theirs.

today was the day of mine and danielle’s challenge.  normally challenges are after class, but, just my luck, today mr. band decided to offer the challenge at the beginning of class.  i guess the thing that tipped me off was when this annoying guy, lets call him richard,  sayed, ” when u lose to danielle, im gonna challenge u.” it doesnt sound that bad but it made me mad that he’s already sure i was gonna lose and the fact that he just bluntly states: im gonna challenge u. then he later adds that he’ll win.

a few minutes later, mr band asks us if we want to do the challenge now. danielle says ok and i get more nervous. then after she’s done im really scared because she was awesome. then as soon as its my turn to play, richards words pop back into my head and all i could hear in my head was ” when u lose to danielle” over and over and so i just blew up and failed at the song and so i lost the challenge. the problem was that it was at the beginning of the period when everyone was listening( i personally love that little contribution) whereas at the end of the period when everyone was packing up and talking amongst each other, its easier.

the thing about stuff that happens to me that makes me too ashamed or sad is that when its in a public place, my hands start to shake and instead of actually frowning, i make an effort to smile and talk a lot more than normal( which is how people who know me really well and know how quiet i normally am makes them realize somethings not right)

so after the challenge and me and danielle sit down in our new chairs, i find out why i did so terribly on this challenge( because while i was practicing, i was doing perfectly fine) while danielle had gone to honor band auditions only 2 days ago in front of those scary judge – like people, i had already been too scared to audition. so while danielle was perfectly comfortable playing in front of people, im not as relaxed. actually the opposite. the only time i can play in front of people without getting nervous is when the rest of the band sitting right next to me because i know if i mess up, there are people to cover for me.

anyway, back on topic, in conclusion, i obviously should not plan to become a soloist because clearly i would fail epically( because freezing on stage before a concert is definitely not a good thing) hopefully i can improve that fear eventually…

2009- aah the memories…

with there being only 3 days of 2009 left, i think back to the year for lots of memories, some good, some bad.

• january ’09- only my second month having this blog, and as i look at the posts, i see some really crappy ones. i think the first time i actually had something worth blogging about was in:
• february ’09- i look at these posts and i see that there are all on the emoness saga. remember when every post was about the idiot jx? it took me so long to finally learn that i dont need her anymore, and i never did need her because in the projects we used to do together i used to do most of the work. she was depended on me, and with her in my life, im actually happier.  but i didnt understand this until:
• march ’09- march was a time when i was acting smarter about the j.x. situation. there was only 1 post about her. the  rest were about the random day-to-day things in my life. like one: ” let’s rant together!” which you would think would be about j.x. considering the previous month, but was actually about random people such as my teacher.
• april-may ’09- i didnt post these months because i was having my first case of blogger’s block. i went to some of my friend’s birthday parties( lana and mary) and it was a pretty happy and easy time of the year. and soon it would be another happy time of the year: summer…
• june ’09- the month started with j.x. giving me a headache on our last fun trip of the year: camelot golfland. we needed a group to go golfing in and blah blah blah j.x. was being an idiot blah blah blah need i remind you the several times i have crossed out ” idiot” before her name blah blah you know the rest. if you dont: ” psssshhh! forget her” the rest of the month was nice though with promotion and partying it up with sarah, anna, alicia, abbie and such. plus looking forward to 2 whole months without idiot j.x.
• july ’09- i have no posts in this month because the only interesting thing i did this month was go to six flags on the 31st which i made a post about in:
• august ’09- so yes, six flags and all that, then a post about school coming again and then bloggers block for another month until:
• october ’09- this month i went trick or treating( childish, but hey free candy!) with my friend natasha. i only had one post this month, about going to anna’s house and having this kid who really should be smacked upside the head and yes. then bloggers block until
• december ’09- i updated you on many things such as: my old friends getting meaner by the day, seeing the princess and the frog, anna and such dating people( just as a side note, anna and boyfriend broke up. i feel bad for her and all, but really, the relationship lasted 5 days!), and winter formal.

• january ’10-??????

what do you think will be in store for you in 2010? as for me i can only guess! have a very happy new year!